Thursday, October 2, 2014

Rule 1: Move Swiftly and With Purpose

The most basic rule a suburbanite must learn in order to commune with the city is the science of commuting. Chicagoans, unlike Europeans and Californians, believe that travel is a necessity to get a person from point A to point B. It is not a leisurely activity that allows for loligagging, day dreaming, strolling, and/or frolicking. In order to blend into your new surroundings, you must learn to embrace this philosophy.

The most efficient way to do this is to walk, ride, drive, eat, sleep, and breathe swiftly and with purpose. Not a second wasted. Not a moment left to shrivel up.

See Taylor understands!

Mot suburbanites understand the meaning of the word swift (being as that is how they got to school every day), but the difficult term to grasp is purpose. To have purpose means to have a goal or a reason behind your actions. You are walking down the street to get to a meeting. You are standing in line to buy a book to give as a gift to your cousin to learn about rabbits to inspire interest in biology and in turn lead her to receive a Ph D from Harvard.

Nothing is without reason or explanation. Mastering this rule is the key to being a successful suburbanite in the city.